touchscreens | [audio] backdated to the end of the de-aging event

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[audio] backdated to the end of the de-aging event

[Fortuna begins a network call like normal. Well...sort of like normal. She sounds hesitant now, a little slower to speak and not quite so confident. Wherever she's standing, there's an echo.]

Hey Saeng Seong, you know what? [A beat.] ...no, never mind.

[There's a beep and a soft tap as she sets her commlink down. But the audio continues. She doesn't realize the button to end the call didn't register her touch.

She sighs heavily.]

Thought I'd convinced myself I wasn't ugly. But no, I had to go and look human again for a while. Didn't think I could pull a fast one on myself, but I guess I did. [Another sigh, softer, and a pause.] Now what? Now what... Keep telling myself other trolls have it worse? Right, like I'm gonna call all of them ugly. Living a double standard, that's what that'd be.

Drek...thought I was okay. I thought...

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[Although he encountered her as his younger self, he didn't get the information needed to get that it was Fortuna--considering how different she is appearance-wise, it's no big surprise. So he's a little confused when she starts talking to herself.

He's trying his best to be more like his younger self, so he's trying to reach out to people, even if his response is late. Not to mention... he understands what it's like to dislike how different you are from what you used to be.]

what did you mean by looking human again?

[She still can't believe she didn't actually end that call. It was easy, with her large hands, to hit the wrong spot on the screen or to hit two buttons at once (and for the commlink to register neither). Normally, she was careful enough about it, but...this certainly wasn't normal.]

Didn't always look this way. Some of us trolls look human until puberty. For me, that was, hell, might have even happened again if it had gone on a few more weeks.

[If you can't tell from her wording, she's using a speech-to-text program. She can't be bothered to focus on the little keyboard, more aware than ever that her hands are just too big for it.]

you changed without knowing it would happen?

[He sure as hell knows how that is, in a lot of ways. Maybe the reason she's upset is because she wants to look like the way she used to be.]

*Close, but not quite. It's hard to say what she wants, really. She's aware other people consider her pretty or "pretty for a troll"; she does a pretty good job of convincing herself they're right most of the time while deep down believing otherwise. And then there's the guilt of realizing the parts of her that are pretty are the ones that look "more human", and the fact that trolls are big and imposing and have a reputation for violence due to the behavior of the traumatized initial wave of goblinized people, and just the general problems arising from metahumanity as a whole still being more than half human and trolls being the least like that image in general.*

Yeah. I mean my mom told me about my grandma's death once; happened a couple years before I was born. She had heart problems and the shock of goblinizing killed her. So the genes were there, but they skipped my mom so I didn't think it would happen to me, and she never seemed to think so either.

[He doesn't know if it's better or worse that it wasn't done by someone else and was just a genetic thing. ... It's not as if she can just cut her hair and go back to the way she was like he can. Then again, he's not even sure if doing that would be enough to go back to looking the way he was, arm aside.

But what is he supposed to say here? Should he try to reassure her or something?]

you don't have to be human for people to like you. you just have to be a person.

[She's ahead of him on that front, at least.]

*Too bad it's really not an issue of other people liking her...*

Pretty sure there are some unlikable people out there. [unintelligible sound - please edit manually] Don't know what that's supposed to mean. We're all people.

*Sorry you don't recognize the world's most deflated laugh, commlink. She's not going to bother with that manual edit, no matter how tacky it looks.*

Fortuna? Hey what's up?

I don't think you're ugly at all! I think you're awesome! [This was spoken in such honest, warm pleasant tones. This wasn't a pity thing. It was matter of fact]

Be glad you aren't some walking turtle! It doesn't really help with the girls back home...[light laughter] So I totally get how you feel. But trust me. I think you're pretty hot!

[When she hears Michelangelo's voice, her head snaps towards her commlink.]

Drek! Can't believe I left that on... [There's a good long pause, where, by her breathing, picked up by the echo-friendly room, would indicate she's trying to compose herself, before she picks up the commlink.]

...Thanks, I guess. I know I'm kind of...lucky, genetically. [She's still got those horns. She's still fragging huge. She still only shows the skin that's "acceptable" as far as roughness or "scaling" or "warts" went.] And I get what we've got to do is redefine what beauty means, but it feels impossible. It's hard not to buy in, harder than it sounds.

I know...[Michelangelo's voice had the softness of understanding in it, but also incredibly warm. He really did understand in a lot of ways and he cared.]

Hey, if you want, I can come over and keep you company! You don't have to talk if you don't want to. [He added quickly] But sometimes friendly company helps. Plus if you need a hug I'd be happy to give you one! [He really did think Fortuna was a friend, and hoped she would take him up on his offer]

[Did she want company? She wasn't even sure, herself. It takes her a while to respond.]

...I guess I could use a recharge. Don't want to get sick again.

[Which is as close to admitting she needs a hug as she'd get.]

Cool! Where are you? I can meet you.

[Mikey was relieved that she seemed open to have company and he was only too happy to help out a friend]

Building four, 2-09.

[And she didn't particularly feel like leaving.]

Okay awesome. I'll be there in a few okay? [He reassured] I'm just coming over from my place. I'm in building 2.

Cool. See you then.

[She hangs up, for real this time, and sighs. Company means being presentable. Great. While Michelangelo is making the trip, she'll be...attempting to do that.]

[True to his word, it didn't take Michelangelo long to get to Fortuna's place. He was wearing a winter coat to keep warm out in the chill and had the hood pulled down over his head. He was also carrying a cardboard box with some holes on the sides. He knocked on the door of her apartment and waited, a grin on his face]

Knock knock! Guess who?

Come in. [Fortuna calls him from inside.

She...sort of made it to "presentable". If hair that looks like it was combed with her fingers, a ratty tank top, and pajama pants were presentable.

She doesn't particularly feel like trying to look nice right now. It was just part of the lie she'd been telling herself, she thinks.]

[Michelangelo comes in and puts down the box so he can take off his jacket.]

Hey! I came with a surprise that I'm sure will cheer you up!

[The box let out a small cute little meow and Mikey chuckled.]

Woops, surprise revealed...

A cat?

[Sure, cats are cute. Might or might not totally cheer her up, but it's certainly nice of him. So she smiles a bit.]

Well, it's not a surprise anymore. Let the poor thing out of that box already.

Not just any cat!! [Mikey hung up the jacket and reached down to take the lid off the box] This is my cat! His name is Klunk.

[He reaches in the box and picks up the orange and white kitten nestled in the blankets. He mewed and started to purr when Michelangelo cradled him in his arms.]

Klunk, this is my friend Fortuna. Say hi!

Klunk, huh? Odd name for a little furball like that.

[Seems friendly. She can see why he brought him over, at least.]

[Mikey gave Klunk an ear scratch and the kitten stretched with another purring mew happily]

Klunk always cheers me up when I'm sad. So I thought I'd bring him over and help cheer you up! You can hold him if you want! He's pretty friendly.

Sure. Hope I'm not big enough to scare him. [She reaches out, trying not to look too much at the areas of her upper arms where her skin appears rougher, and the "scaling" effect, like overblown freckles, is more random. She thought she'd accepted that, and was only covering it up for the sake of looking better to other people (as it made smooth talking her way through problems so much easier). Hell, even wearing a tank top wouldn't have been out of the ordinary for her. But now...]

Nah! [Mikey laughs] He's used to my brother Raph. If he can handle mister crankypants he can handle anyone. [His tone was light with humor. He liked to poke fun at his brothers, even if they weren't present.]

I think he likes you all ready. I can tell.

[Mikey holds out the purring kitten with a smile, and places him in her held out hands. Her state of dress didn't bother him in the slightest. He was the one practically walking around nude (though with the shell, it didn't seem like it anyway)]

Edited 2015-02-11 05:44 (UTC)

[The kitten fits comfortably in her hands, wide as they are. She can't help but smile a little as he continues to purr.]

How'd he wind up with a name like Klunk?

See? I told ya he likes ya...[Mikey grins, reaching over to scratch the kitten behind the ears.]

Klunk's a stray kitten I found on one of my adventures top-side. It was around Christmas and I ventured out in the snow and to see the sights. I came across bad guys trying to rob a shipment of toys that were supposed to go to an orphanage. Klunk had looked so cold, so I put him in my jacket and he ended up along for the ride when I stopped the bad guys. He stuck with me ever since!

[He shrugged a little.] The name just came to me! It suited him.

[She carefully draws Klunk in a little closer so she can support his weight and pet him. She feels kind of like an elephant handling a teacup...it was another thing she thought she was done with. Those days of looking in the mirror and sometimes thinking she looked great and sometimes thinking she looked like the monster her race had been named after...]

Owning a pet's a lot of work, and cats are finicky. [There's that faint smile again.] Looks like you've kept his loyalty pretty well. At least cats don't care what the people in their lives look like.

It doesn't seem like work to me! Klunk's my best pal. He's part of the family.

[He's quiet as he watches Fortuna and listens to her words. They might have had different lives in different worlds with different circumstances - but in a way, Michelangelo could understand and relate to the root of the problem.]

Hey...I know. [Mikey regarded her with a serious expression for once - but there was compassionate understanding in his blue eyes.] C'mon, we can get comfy and stuff.

[There was an unspoken invitation for her to get things off her chest if she wanted to - but he'd be more than happy to be friendly company for a while. She didn't have to talk if she wasn't comfortable.]

[She looked up at that, raising an eyebrow for a moment before shrugging the statement off. She didn't get much opportunity to talk about herself in the first place, and then generally either she didn't care to talk about it or they didn't care to hear about it or both.]

...Yeah, I know you know. It's even worse for you, really. You can't go out in public at all.

[Mikey was quiet a moment before responding.]

It doesn't devalue what you go through though. [He said honestly with surprising insight.] I know we have different circumstances and stuff, but I know it can hurt. It's why I wanted to come over and be with you. It's because I know where you're coming from.

[He smiled a little.] And if anyone has said anything to you to make you feel bad - I can go have a talk with them...[His blue eyes twinkled. He would never let anyone hurt one of his friends.]

Heh...nah. This place is actually the most accepting I've ever seen. Nobody's said a word like that to me here.

[She guesses she could go to the Ork Underground back home, for acceptance. She doesn't know why she's never been.]

It's...really, it's just me.

[Actually, it's the society she comes from and while she's aware of that on a logical level, the emotional level doesn't quite line up.]

Good. [Mikey said with a decisive nod, happy that no one was mistreating her here. As for the rest that she said...he could understand. There was nothing to say but actions spoke louder than words.

The ninja simply stepped forward, wrapped his arms around Fortuna in a friendly hug, mindful of the kitten in her hands. Not sure if she'd shy away or not, he made sure to keep it loose so that she could back away if she wanted.]

Edited 2015-03-12 23:40 (UTC)

[Fortuna flinched involuntarily as the turtle hugged her, her arms drawing closer to her body, holding the kitten in her hands close as she eventually leaned into the hug. She may have needed one, but she wasn't a huggy person, really.]

...Thanks.

[Michelangelo was aware of her flinching, but was happy she didn't move away. Even though he wasn't one to get hugs that often, he enjoyed them.]

No problem! [He beamed, letting her go] I brought some of my comics if you wanna just hang out and be comfy. I'm more than happy to listen if you need to vent though. [It was clear that she didn't have to if she wasn't comfortable. Mikey was just happy to offer her contact and company.]

[Well, judging from the voice it looks like Kit's back to her normal age too. Too bad; she'd kind of liked having a grown-up body.]

Who said you're ugly? Has somebody been making fun of you?

[Because if they have they're gonna get such a kitty tongue-lashing!]

[Damn it...why did she have to go and miss the button? She wasn't exactly trying to broadcast her insecurities to the whole city...]

No, it's-... [Okay, she has to calm down now. Think. Try to describe an aspect of racism it's hard to put into words to begin with to a kid...]

It's hard to explain. ...Where I come from, most people are human.

[Hoo-boy Fortuna, if you only knew how much racism kit had already run across in her young life. Thundara kind of sucked in that regard.

There's a brief silence on the other end as Kit considers, then takes a guess.]

And the people there were mean to you because you weren't like them?

It's not really that simple. It's not like...bullying. It's more like with so many humans, that's what's "normal".

[Kit thinks about that for a second.]

Were there a bunch of stupid rules that said you weren't allowed to go certain places, or live certain places? Stuff like that?

[Because this is starting to sound familiar.]

Mostly unspoken. It sounds like you know what I'm talking about.

Yeah. Thundara was like that too. If you weren't a cat, you weren't allowed into the upper city without special permission. It was pretty much the same if you were cats like me and my family, who had tails. We weren't allowed to live in the upper city, and there were certain places that we weren't allowed to go.

There was more to it than that, but no one ever really explained the rest to me. Mama said I'd understand it when I was older, but I still think it's dumb.

Edited 2015-02-05 04:04 (UTC)

It is dumb. But with the way they're handling it, I'm surprised there hasn't been a revolt. At least the people back home have the decency to pretend we can get approved for, say, a nice house with its actual value, they just say no.

...There was. The lizards attacked and destroyed Thundara after Mumm-Ra gave them weapons and technology. It's in ruins now. And one of King Claudis' generals, Grune, turned traitor and helped them in return for power from Mumm-Ra.

[There's a bit of a pause, and when she continues, her tone is quieter and more thoughtful.]

Us cats... we treated the lizards really badly for a long time. Generations. We even turn some of them into slaves. They had every right to be angry, and even to hate us. But... I still don't think that gave them the right to do what they did.

Nobody wants to attack innocents. But when something goes on for generations like that, it's hard to see anyone on the other side as innocent anymore. It can sometimes be just one generation for that kind of hatred to set in, really...

[She's guilty of that, herself, really. It's hard not to blame the random guy in his cubicle for the CEO's decisions sometimes, after all.]

Yeah... Cats and lizards have been fighting each other for a long time. They would attack us, then people would say we needed to get back at them for what they did. Then they would attack us to get back at us for what we did, and it just kept going like that.

It's stupid. And it doesn't fix anything.

[Part of her really wants to go into comparisons of that situation to the local one and her own worries about such, but she's smart enough not to do so on the network. Instead she just sighs and tries to steer the conversation in a slightly more positive direction.]

I'm just glad Lion-O's not going to bring all those stupid rules back once we beat Mumm-Ra. We're gonna have to unite all the animal tribes to be able to do that, and he's already off to a pretty good start.

There's always someone like that. We've got someone looking out for our rights too. Hopefully your Lion-O's a...uh, cat of his word. Here's hoping he can handle the opposition, too. Hate doesn't die easy.

He is. [pause] I think that's why the Sword of Omens chose him; he's just the kind of king we need right now.

I don't know about afterwards, but... I really think he can pull everybody together enough to beat Mumm-Ra. Then we'll just have to try not to mess stuff up again once things settle down.

Edited 2015-03-01 02:55 (UTC)

Hopefully you won't. It's gonna be hard not to, I'll bet. Like I said, hate doesn't die easy.

[A pause, as she looks at herself in the mirror again. Even self-hate doesn't die easily...]

But sometimes all it takes is one powerful person.

Yeah. Especially when that person has help from his friends. Or her friends.

[Slight hint there. Because Kit is always willing to help out a friend, in either world.]

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[audio] backdated to the end of the de-aging event

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